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href="/kcms/blog/lst?sys_types=%E8%83%BD%E5%8A%9B%E6%8F%90%E5%8D%87&tp=blogs">能力提升</a> <a href="javascript:void(0);" onclick="kcms.saveit('blogs',128535);">【收藏該博客】</a> </div> <div id="1jjygpe" class='articleContent'> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan" align="left"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-hansi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體">怎樣讓孩子輸?shù)闷?/span></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 15pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體"><?xml version='1.0' encoding='utf-8'?><o:p></o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan" align="left"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體"><o:p> </o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; TEXT-INDENT: 24pt; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan" align="left"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-hansi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體">常聽到家長有怎樣的感慨：我家小孩“輸不起”，在游戲中輸了，便不認(rèn)輸，發(fā)脾氣，甚至退出不再玩；畫沒畫好，就把辛辛苦苦畫了很久的畫一下就撕碎了。</span></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體"><o:p></o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; TEXT-INDENT: 24pt; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan" align="left"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體"><o:p> </o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; TEXT-INDENT: 24pt; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan" align="left"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-hansi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體">培養(yǎng)孩子承受挫敗的容忍力，讓孩子擁有一份“輸?shù)闷稹钡木?，有助于提升孩子的“抗逆力”‘使他日后在遇到挫折時(shí)不容易跌倒，以正面、樂觀的心態(tài)戰(zhàn)勝困難。那么，如何培養(yǎng)孩子“輸?shù)闷稹钡木衲兀?/span></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體"><o:p></o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; TEXT-INDENT: 24pt; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan" align="left"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體"><o:p> </o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; TEXT-INDENT: 24pt; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan" align="left"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-hansi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體">觀點(diǎn)一：鼓勵(lì)能讓孩子緩解情緒反應(yīng)</span></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體"><o:p></o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; TEXT-INDENT: 24pt; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan" align="left"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-hansi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體">孩子的所謂挫折感、無力感大多是由后天學(xué)習(xí)得來的。當(dāng)孩子做得不好時(shí)，家長總會(huì)有這樣的責(zé)罵：“你沒把心思放在學(xué)習(xí)上，恐怕不是讀書的材料！“久而久之，孩子也會(huì)用這些想法去評(píng)價(jià)自己。因此，當(dāng)面對(duì)困難或失敗時(shí)，便由于失去自信心而采用放棄和逃避的態(tài)度。對(duì)此，每當(dāng)我的孩子遇到挫折、情緒低落的時(shí)候，我就會(huì)給他講一些成功人物的故事，講他們?cè)趭^斗過程中是怎么樣的精神去面對(duì)困難的。另外，當(dāng)孩子遇到挫折時(shí)，我們不要揪住孩子的錯(cuò)處不放，也不要將焦點(diǎn)一味地放在結(jié)果上，重要的是孩子在此過程中嘗試以及為此付出努力。讓孩子明白“凡事盡力而為”便可，即使失敗也并不代表自己沒用，家長更不會(huì)因此而不疼愛他。</span></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體"><o:p></o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; TEXT-INDENT: 24pt; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan" align="left"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體"><o:p> </o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; TEXT-INDENT: 24pt; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan" align="left"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-hansi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體">觀點(diǎn)二：正視失敗是為了避免失敗</span></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-hansi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體">。</span></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體"><o:p></o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; TEXT-INDENT: 24pt; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan" align="left"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-hansi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體">兒子很小的時(shí)候，我們就有目的地從游戲中讓他學(xué)習(xí)面對(duì)失敗，讓他有機(jī)會(huì)在玩樂中嘗試“輸”的滋味，體驗(yàn)“勝敗乃兵家常事”的道理。當(dāng)然，孩子經(jīng)歷“輸”的時(shí)候總會(huì)稍有失望和不快的感覺。這時(shí)我們就給他以適當(dāng)?shù)陌参亢凸膭?lì)，告訴他：“我知道輸?shù)粲螒蛄钅阌悬c(diǎn)不開心，不過這次輸不代表每次都會(huì)輸，只要盡力參與，總會(huì)有辦法成功的?！爆F(xiàn)在孩子長大了，每當(dāng)他在學(xué)習(xí)上遇到困難想退縮的時(shí)候，我就會(huì)給他一個(gè)參照物和一個(gè)他可以看得到、能達(dá)到的目標(biāo)。我會(huì)明白地告訴他：“你現(xiàn)在的成績比起媽媽剛學(xué)的時(shí)候并不差，如果你放棄了，你就永遠(yuǎn)是這個(gè)水平了，永遠(yuǎn)不不上媽媽了?！睆慕逃⒆又形腋杏X到，讓孩子正式失敗，才能讓他在失敗和挫折中堅(jiān)強(qiáng)起來，不至于被失敗和挫折打倒。</span></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體"><o:p></o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; TEXT-INDENT: 24pt; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan" align="left"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體"><o:p> </o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; TEXT-INDENT: 24pt; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan" align="left"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-hansi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體">觀點(diǎn)三：擁有豁達(dá)的心胸是“輸?shù)闷稹钡年P(guān)鍵。</span></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體"><o:p></o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; TEXT-INDENT: 24pt; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan" align="left"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-hansi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體">經(jīng)?？吹接屑议L這樣教育自己的孩子：“他打你，你不會(huì)也打他呀？”“拿大的，挑大個(gè)兒的拿！”“你真窩囊，你不會(huì)跟他搶?。　薄@樣的引導(dǎo)，怎么可能讓孩子“輸?shù)闷稹?？兒子以前也因?yàn)楦∨笥淹嬗螒蜉數(shù)舳蟀l(fā)脾氣，，使性子再也不跟人家玩了。我嚴(yán)肅地告訴她：“要是你贏了，別的小朋友也不再跟你玩了，那怎么辦呀？”要想孩子輸?shù)闷?，首先就得培養(yǎng)孩子不計(jì)較。一個(gè)心胸寬廣的孩子，還有什么不能容下的呢？</span></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體"><o:p></o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; TEXT-INDENT: 24pt; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan" align="left"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體"><o:p> </o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; TEXT-INDENT: 24pt; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan" align="left"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-hansi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體">觀點(diǎn)四：培養(yǎng)孩子正面的樂觀感。</span></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: red; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體"><o:p></o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; TEXT-INDENT: 24pt; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan" align="left"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-ascii-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-hansi-font-family: 'Times New Roman'; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體">孩子遇到挫折，家長不能拿放大鏡來放大他的過錯(cuò)或評(píng)定他的能力問題，那樣，孩子變會(huì)將問題歸因于自己能力不行，漸漸地，便建立起一種消極、悲觀的信念，繼而變得難以承受挫折。我兒子每次考試成績不理想，我都告訴他：“一切只是暫時(shí)的，這次沒考好咱們下次繼續(xù)努力?！比缓蠓e極地幫助他找原因，尋求對(duì)策。作為家長，對(duì)孩子適當(dāng)?shù)恼婵隙ㄊ潜仨毜?，尤其是在孩子遇到挫折的時(shí)候，這樣能從小為孩子播下“積極樂觀”的種子，使他面對(duì)挫折時(shí)仍抱有“盼望”與“轉(zhuǎn)機(jī)”。孩子心境樂觀，也就更樂意去思考解決問題的方法，自然也就不會(huì)“輸不起”了。</span></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; COLOR: green; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體"><o:p></o:p></span></b></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt; WORD-BREAK: break-all; TEXT-INDENT: 24pt; TEXT-ALIGN: left; mso-pagination: widow-orphan" align="left"><span lang="EN-US" style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: 宋體; mso-font-kerning: 0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: 宋體"> <o:p></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p><span style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Times New Roman"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p><span style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Times New Roman"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p><span style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Times New Roman"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p><span style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Times New Roman"> </span></o:p></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="MARGIN: 0cm 0cm 0pt"><span lang="EN-US"><o:p><span style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt; FONT-FAMILY: Times New Roman"> </span></o:p></span></p>  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